Second Day Of The New Year (Challenge #2 - Journal 500 Words A Day)

My next goal that I'm going to be implementing in my life is journaling 500 words a day. Like I've said earlier in this blog, I have kept several journals online in the past--- I also have some offline that I've tried to keep up with that eventually just became just a few scrawled words in a book with many more empty pages than pages I have anything written on. I always say I'm going to keep up with my writing, but other than a journal I kept on LiveJournal for almost 8 years, I have never been able to stick with it for very long.

I love old journal entries though, in whichever format I happen to find them. They're little mementos from that time, that head space I was in at the time. I've also seen growth through reading old journal entries and thinking 'wow, I am so not that person anymore' and following the tracks in the dirt behind me, like the little strings in a serial killer's apartment that are connected to maps and trinkets. Ha! But seriously, you can connect the dots so much easier when they are right in front of you.



I also know I'm dealing with a lot of depression right now in my life, so maybe this journal will become a place where I can rant and discuss the pitfalls of trying to become someone different. There's going to be a lot of struggle this year, I can already tell that just by my mood and knowing some of the things I'm going to have to do next. I need a place where I can unwind the thoughts in my brain from the ball of tightly wound string the chaos has created.

There are many other reasons for keeping a journal writing habit that can be found here: 100 Benefits of Journaling. Some really good benefits from something that'll probably take me about 10 minutes a day.

So that's my next challenge. I was already pretty much doing it, but I want to start with some easy goals in the beginning so I can work up to bigger and better things. Also, for the next few days my life is packed with visiting friends and board gaming and restaurants. Ian, Hilary and Darryl are visiting from out of state so things are busy, busy, busy! We spent the first day of the year going to the Silver Diner and playing some games at Bobby's house. It was a nice hangout, as the rest of the week has been, but I still feel out of place in that group. I wonder if I have any place in the world that I can call my own. Most of these people are just friends of my roommate and they've known each other for years now. I came into the clan later, with much drama that filled my life, few social skills, lots of shyness and the oddness of being a single person in a group of married people. As much fun as it is to hang out sometimes, it's also hard in a way I doubt any of them really understand. I feel like a perpetual outsider.